At a stage in life, tragedies do happened that will fracture the very foundation on which we stand and also drained the strength that we have. Our life, as we have known it, is forever changed and we find ourselves in an unexpected struggle, first just to survive and then to move forward.

At this point in life, the source to which we’ve always draw our strength may be blocked off by pains deeper than a stab wound and from emotions as solid as it may be; it can be disastrous if conscious efforts is not made by self; and it is only one and one alone that can make that conscious effort to bring oneself back into the healing journey necessary even in excess of supports & care from families, friends & love ones.

In this darkest and bleakest moments we can pick up one of the books that have been written on how to deal with grief and loss; but “we still have to try and make sense out of its content, relate it to our own circumstances, emotions and then pick out that word or that sentence that bring comfort onto us”

Loss can affects anyone at some stage in live;  for every loss we suffer, we may have to handle it in a totally different way from one individual to another depending on the relationship to the loss: whether daughter, son, a close family member, a friend, a colleague or a pet.

The process through which we pass: the stages or cycle of bereavement involving grief, denial, shock, anger and eventually acceptance, of some sort. Does this really help? Some of us may think we’re strange if we don’t pass through this cycle, yet others may think they’re strange if they get ‘stuck’ and yo-yo forward and backwards through the circle and never get on the road to recovery. We may worry about things said, or unsaid, actions taken or not taken and regret that these things will never be put right.

It is important to acknowledge your loss, give yourself permission to feel and understand that whatever you feel is right for you and you alone; you alone know what you are going through!  Recovery from loss may take as long as it takes; don’t bit yourself about it, there is no right or wrong way- Make it a day at a time, it is still a day at a time for me.